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Element: WOMEN

Symbol: WO+

Atomic mass: Accepted as 59 Kg; isotopes may vary from 40-200 kg.

Occurrence: Copious quantities in all urban areas.

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES

1. Boils at room temperature

2. Freezes without any known reason.

3. Melts if given special treatment.

4. Bitter, if incorrectly used.

5. Sweet as Honey if given a proper treatment.

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES

1. Have great affinity for Gold, Silver and a range of precious stones
and absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.

2. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.

3. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

COMMON USES

1. Highly ornamental, good samples can increase your social value.

2. Can be great aid to administration.

TESTS

1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when happy.

2. Turns green when placed behind a better specimen.

POTENTIAL HAZARD

Illegal to possess more than one


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5 Comments

  1. hehe 🙂

  2. 3. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

    HAHAHAHA loved the post :p

  3. @Mubi….

    Thanks 🙂

  4. This is very amusing 🙂 I like the way you have “clinical-ized” the female gender. You should get an award for just being able to do that because I can’t figure women out to save my soul. 🙂 Although I do have the theory that women are obsessed with the meta-physical and men are obsessed with the physical. Thus the female has already envisioned in her mind her perfect man, of which no man will ever live up to, therefore the possibility of her ever being happy are slim. Where as the man obsessed with the physical…. Well that pretty much speaks for itself.

    But one factor we cannot deny is to factor in the human nature of co-dependency. That we are one of the few species on this planet who will spend their entire life looking for their soul mate….. Unless of course you’re a salmon.

  5. Hey now…
    That exploding thing–there’s always a reason. Oh, you did say “known reason”….

    OK, that IS funny.


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